Cambridge Family Law Practice

Contact between adopted children and their natural parents should be encouraged where appropriate, the President of the Family Division declared in a recent speech.

Sir Andrew McFarlane was invited to give the keynote speech at a conference held by the Parents of Traumatised Adopted Teens Organisation, otherwise known as POTATO. During a talk entitled Adapting Adoption to the Modern World, England’s most senior family law judge traced evolving attitudes to adoption, noting that the stigma previously associated with illegitimacy had encouraged a secretive approach in past decades.

“Until the 1970s adoption largely involved the relinquishing of young babies by a parent or parents with no expectation of any future contact. Children placed under this arrangement were usually very young and had no attachment or memory of their birth family. The stigma attached to illegitimacy and infertility meant that the decision not to promote contact was considered to be a protective factor for the adopter, the adopted child and the birth family.”

The situation had since changed, with the routine approach becoming a farewell visit from the natural parents, followed by a usually annual exchange of letters and photographs. But, the President noted, many such arrangements break down over time.

However, recent research suggests that some children would benefit from closer contact with their birth families. Sir Andrew cited a number of studies in his speech, including a report by Neil, Cossar, Jones, Lorgelly and Young. These authors explained:

“Adoptive parents have reported the ways they felt maintaining a relationship had been helpful to their child… Some parents felt their child would not have been able to commit to adoption without this: “[it] would be ripping her away from the family she loved … and she would never allow herself to love us if that was the case.” Others felt that contact helped children feel less worried about family members: “She needed the reassurance that her mum was okay,” or that maintaining relationships gave their child important lessons for adult life: “[it’s] better for his relationships when he grows up. If he sees it is not losing all the time, then it is good for him”.

They continued:

“Where adopted children have had positive relationships with parents, grandparents, or siblings before adoption, feelings of sadness, loss, and anxiety can be strong when relationships are cut off. Children generally find staying in touch with siblings or grandparents less emotionally complex than contact with parents, and contact with these birth family members is often lasting and rewarding.”

Consequently, Sir Andrew suggested during his speech that it should not be taken as a given that arrangements for contact between adopted children and their natural parents would deter properly informed potential adopters. The President called for a general culture shift, with post adoption contact properly considered as a matter of course by family courts and adoption agencies when determining the needs and best interests of each child. If post adoption contact is judged to be suitable and appropriate, it should be formally included in the adoption order (known as a ‘placement order’). Currently, decisions about contact are often left to adoptive parents, who may not always have the full picture.

The President also quoted from an earlier speech in which he had considered the “explosion of digital communication in the past two decades”:

“…and the possibility of an adopted child, quietly, alone in their bedroom, without the knowledge of their adopted parents, tracing and finding their family. I said:
‘The temptation to do so, and then to make contact with [the birth family], must be almost irresistible’.”

Jeremy Ford, one of the partners here at Cambridge Family Law Practice, who has extensive experience of acting in adoption proceedings notes “Sir Andrew rightly recognises that changes in society and social attitudes necessitate an ongoing review into the court’s approach to post adoption contact. But the most influence should be the emotional welfare and well-being of the adopted children moving forwards, as per the research that Sir Andrew quotes.”

Read Sir Andrew McFarlane’s full speech here.